11th hour…

It is the 11th hour and so much has yet to begin even as too little has been completed. Fast rushing time has done it’s work and this moment, this Lent, is fading away as soon as it has started. What has been done? What has been changed? How is the world, and myself for that matter, more like its future and less like its past?

In truth the time, this Lent, has been filled with worry and work and almost everything that is not of either its law or spirit. Spring has come and yet winter has kept its strong grip. Resolution, as small as it was, has become fatigue, and fatigue has birthed carelessness. Sinner I entered, sinner I remain.

Yet there are four days left and though they cannot replace the others or the things missing they are still four days. Finish well, finish well, finish well. Perhaps there is still time to find a garment presentable enough for the feast. Perhaps there is still time to find a way into the door, or at least to see through its window. Time is merciless but God is merciful and perhaps if I cannot stand in the light I can at least stand in the shadows that are still better than darkness.

I am a sinner that wants to be holy. I am sick and wish to be well. I speak boldly and yet am often afraid. I believe, Lord help me in my unbelief. Perhaps this is enough, in this 11th hour. I have nothing else to offer, but I will try.


2 thoughts on “11th hour…

  1. Father, bless,
    A wonderful post – each year I think “I can’t do Holy Week, I’m too weak, too tired, too sinful…” and yet, I find that I get through it, weak, tired and sinful as I am, and then arrive at glorious and wonderful Pascha.

    My humble prayers for a wonderful Holy Week and Pascha for you and your parish.

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